My days

are a blur of "whaaaaaaa!!!" It seems like each day is just a millisecond and then it's over. Take today for example: wake up at 5:38 AM, get ready, leave for school at 6:21, get to school at 6:47, get dressed for PE, play volleyball and laugh at Ms. Osborne screaming like a madwoman. Then, get dressed go to 1st period, then second. In second I get my test back; got an A of some sort. At break all I have time for is to go to my locker then go all the way to the portables for third period where I see an inappropriate music video. In fourth period I work on making my candle; by the way: I suck at working with clay. At lunch I had a meeting for class stuff. In leadership I tried to get the minutes signed but Butch wouldn't sign them. 6th period I believe I failed my test. See, I know what happened throughout the day in general. But that's all I can remember. I can't remember any details! This is how all days are. I need sleep. Well, back to homework. Done with my physics homework. Just English and Spanish left. Almost there!

This zero period thing...

is turning out to be a very, very tiring thing. I knew I was going to be tired, but not this tired. This is like one-hundred times worse than I anticipated. Stupid San Jose! Why? Why? Why, is it necessary for me to stay here like a prisoner against her will. No one gets along in this house and I'm sick of it! I've been sick of it for quite a while, but because I am forced to stay here I have to get up an extra half hour earlier than I would normally, I hate it even more. And for what? To drive a half hour to go to school, do my daily routine, and then come back and go to sleep. The point of that is what, exactly? Enjoy the fights? I've finally determined you must. For a reason I may never be able to fathom, but that's okay because I know your head is all messed up... it must be. It's the only explanation I could come up with. Anyway, it's only been a week of zero period, we've only dressed out once, and I am completely exhausted. We haven't even started playing any sort of sport and I feel like a freaking zombie. This is nonsense! Once my grades start slipping, maybe they'll realize that I need more sleep-I'm not invincible, people! I fell asleep in the car on the way to San Jose today. We were getting onto the 101 on-ramp and crash, apparently I'm asleep because I don't remember the merge onto the ramp and then I woke up as we came up the driveway. Darn you, alarm clock that wakes me up at 5:15. Though, technically, I should be thanking you. You are what gets me to school on time, so I apologize. And now I'm talking to an alarm clock. Great. Either her craziness is rubbing off on me or I need some extra sleep. We'll go with the second one, thanks.

Hello Junior Year!

Exactly a week from right now I will be done with my first day of junior year. I had registration today and I got my schedule. As far as I know, I have at least one person I know in each of my classes. Let me know if you are too:

0 period: PE
1st: Honors English with Ms. Roy
2nd: Precalculus with Mr. Robydeck
3rd: Spanish 3 with Mrs. Lupe Vargas
4th: Ceramics with Mr. Albrecht
5th: Leadership with Mrs. Butcher
6th: Physics with Mr. Fowler

Now that I know I have the classes I want and there's no more stress, I'm pretty excited to start this year. There's a lot of things to look forward to: thinking seriously about college, prom, last year of STAR testing, and others, I just can't think of any more atthe moment.

It was good seeing everyone again today. I'll see y'all again in a week(=

LAST DAY! LAST DAY! LAST DAY!

Yes, tomorrow is my last day of school. I'm really, really excited. However, I have to take my final which I'm quite nervous about. I have a 96% in the class, but I'm still scared. We'll see though. I'm more worried about the multiple choice than the essay, actually. Strange, huh?

In other news: starting today my sister has left me alone with a psycho woman. No, not really. I mean she's left me but just til Saturday night. I'll live, I hope. I'm glad she gets to get away though. She's going to the CASL Leadership camp. She's pretty nervous but it's fun, she should be excited. I just have to keep myself busy until Saturday, so if anyone wants to hangout... just let me know(=

Well, off to continue studying. Wish me luck!

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

So I went to this movie at 12:15 a.m. yesterday with my wonderful, dark friend Meera. While we were waiting for the movie to start, we played a funny little game that she and Ashley introduced me to at class and then we talked for a while. I'm glad because we hadn't really had one of those deep talks in a while. I love my yin. Haha! Anyway, it was quite an amazing movie. Super funny for the first half and super sad for the second half... and a little bit freaky throughout. Nonetheless, it was pretty awesome. It has, in fact, inspired me to reread all of the Harry Potter books. I began and finished the first one yesterday and now I'm in the middle of the second. And yeah the movies are good, but the books are a hundred times better. There's so much more detail and emotion in the books. But that could just be the nerd in me speaking. Haha. But after I finish all of the books, I'm going to have an HP movie marathon. Care to join me?

One week of class left! (= Only three more classes after tonight's. I'm really excited. I'm a little scared for my final though. Good thing is, though, I know what he's looking for in the essay, which is the majority of the final. And I've gotten an A on all of my essays this far. I should be fine. I hope.

I GOT A FOUR!

I'm not really sure exactly what that means, but I know it's good. A three is average, and barely anyone gets a five, which is the best score possible. And if your wondering, all of this has to do with my AP World History test that I took in May. I was super stressed, studying like a crazy woman, and being quite a meanie because of it. All of that paid off though. I'm really quite proud of myself. Now I have college credits for World History. Well, actually it depends on what college I'm talking about. But whatever. It still looks good that I got a four. Wooo!

Okay, off to study for more history. Dang, I don't even want to be a history major! This is a bunch of nonsense.

"FIREWAAAAKS!"

Last night was fun, fun, fun. Even if I lost half of the people I was supposed to be hanging out with because the lights turned off before the fireworks, it was fun watching them with Meera, Jeffrey, Phillip, and (later) Ashley. Found Vy, Cecilia, Bettina, Joann, and Victoria after. Dang, it was packed though. Nice seeing everyone, even those I wouldn't normally hangout with-I missed them. Strange, eh?

Before I left, my family and I had a huge, fattening, definitely American two meals. For lunch we had homemade chili cheese fries and for dinner we had hot dogs with way too many delicious condiments. Oh, how I love fourth of July.

My midterm is OVER! Yay! And I'm pretty sure I did well on it... we'll see tomorrow. I got an A- on my essay that was due last week. Much better than I thought, and I'm glad. I only needed one more point for an A though )=

I miss my friends. School feels never ending and like a prison! Even when I'm not there, there's some kind of long, obnoxious reading to be doing. Oh well, at least I get to see some people at class.

Oh, and if you haven't yet, you should definitely read Along for the Ride by Sarah Dessen. It's really good.

Europeans and the New World

This essay is going to kill me. It's quite boring. I'm finished with about a page and a half. I don't know exactly where I'm going with this essay, but I guess we'll see when I get there, now won't we? Or, I will anyway. I just got done writing about Hernan Cortes, conquistador extraordinaire! Not that you care. And frankly, neither do I, but this class is necessary for me to graduate, so oh well. I can't believe my midterm is on Thursday, already.

This last week was a waste of time. (As most weeks here in boring San Jose are...) I did absolutely nothing; pointless. I wish I could just stay in Milpitas full time. Why is this fact so difficult for certain people to understand?

Hello summer!

The weather has been heating up and I like it! Starting Sunday I'm back home in Milpitas. Yipee!

Essay due on Monday )= But this class is pretty interesting. The teacher's pretty entertaining, anyway.

liberated

Wow. The fact that I feel liberated by this small thing shows just how much of a hold he has on me. It's quite disturbing, really. Oh well, I'm over it. Can't treat me like you do and get away with it. Well, actually, you do get away with it. Gosh I need to start standing up for myself more often.
Went to the library for the first time yesterday. That place is nice! A lot of empty space, but it makes it look bigger. Haha. I was such a loser, studying at the library alone. Oh well, I got a huge portion of my chemistry studying done.
I'm a little stressed about this weeks finals. That's what I get for slacking off this semester. In five of my six classes I have a borderline A/B grade. I have to ace every single one of my finals to come up with a 4.0 this semester. Usually I don't have to worry about at least half of my finals because my grade on it won't matter. But no, not this semester. I promise that next year I will not slack off. I will study for every test and will not procrastinate. Please hold me to this? Thanks.
Good luck to everyone next week! We all need it...
LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL! Only 4 days until summer. Wow, time flies. I'm half way done with high school. It's kind of amazing.

I can no longer go into Wingstop without being absolutely sick to my stomach. Who does that!?

PS: Thanks for mentioning me in your Senior Will, Omair. Stop it! Oh, how I will miss hearing that every day... though I have no clue why you tell me to stop it, whatever "it" is.

end of year picnic

Fun stuff, but kind of a downer at the same time. Dang, so many good memories in leadership. I'm going to miss those kids. Good thing I'm in that class next year. Only, we'll be missing part of our family. I miss them all already.

Apparently all Bryans and Brians have no morals. Just walk around hitting whatever girl (especially Courtney) they please. Today, I was a victim of Bryan Castanares. JERK! I had a handprint on my leg for quite a while. And usually, being slapped only hurts for about a second or two. But no... this one kinda hurt. Oh well, I'm over it and now accept his apology. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I'm hyper.

Off to my Alexander Solzhenitsyn biography and Macbeth Quizam. Yeah, quizam. Pretty snazzy word, ain't it? Peace suckaa.

Oh, by the way, in leadership, I am apparently Most Likely to win a Nobel Peace Prize. Haha, thanks guys. I love you, leadership family!

11 more days

That's right. Only 11 more days we have to go to school until summer vacation officially begins. It's kind of bittersweet. I thought I'd be so ready, so excited for this year to be over, but really, I don't think I am. I've said it before, but I've gotten closer to a few seniors and I'm really going to miss them a lot. This may sound weird for a high schooler to say, but I am NOT ready for summer vacation. NOT, NOT, NOT. But then I am. I'm sick of waking up early, going to my tedious classes, just watching the clock. And then I come home and complain that the year is almost over. Dang, I'm just one big walking contradiction. I make no sense, but who cares.

Tomorrow's the Leadership End-of-Year Picnic. Again, bittersweet is what it is. I'm pretty excited though. Food, running around, music, possibly a slip and slide? What better way is there to say "hello, summer"? I don't believe there is one. I want to go to graduation. Anyone have an extra ticket? I'll be there. And I'll be crying. Stupid seniors, why do you have to leave?

Back to my history crap. Again, walking contradiction. I HATE this class! Ironic how I'm taking a history class over the summer. Oh well, it'll be better. I hope...

PS: Thanks, Bryan! You're "a pretty cool kid, too!" HAHAHAHA!

I missed my girls

But last night with them was so fun. The movie was not so great, but hanging out together and everything... I'm so glad I did. Dancing around, talking, singing. Oh man, next time Cecilia and Bettina need to make it back to hangout too. I feel like it's been so long since I've just gone over and hung out with everyone.

I love you girls!

It's fixed!

Yipee! Thanks jerks down there making fun of me.

Now I can get to what I was really going to talk about yesterday. I don't really remember but, whatever. This weekend is like the hottest weekend of the year so far and I'm stuck here )= I should be at the pool with my friends, but nooooo; as usual, I'm stuck in San Jose. Oh well, only two hours and twenty minutes until I get to go back to my home sweet home.

Monday I register for summer school. I'm nervous that I won't get into the class I want. I really really hope I do.

On Friday I made two new friends. I was sitting with Meera, Vy, Victoria, Ashley, Bettina, Rhoadan, Michelle, and Tram waiting for the commissioner interviews to finish and then Omair and Ayush called me over and introduced me to Lendl and Ralph. I felt bad though. Ayush and Omair were Lendl's ride somewhere and it seemed like he was kind of in a hurry but they kept telling me stories! The interviews finally ended and I began walking home with Michelle so they left too.

AP History stuff is finally done! My test was on Thursday and I am so relieved that it's over. All that stress and studying and stress and more studying and stressing even more. It's all over(= It makes me want to party. But I still have 18 days of school and then... let the party begin. There's only one sad thing about the school year ending. We have to say goodbye to the seniors. This year I met a lot of them and I'm gonna miss them... a lot.

dedrater si draobyek ym

.yaw eht yb ,rehtaew siht evol I !em pleH .ti xif ot woh wonk t'nod I .drawkcab ylno ,drawrof epyt t'now tI

Summer Lovin'

That's right, kids. Summer is almost here(=

I'm so excited, I can't contain myself! When I look outside in the morning to see what I'm going to wear that day and because it looks absolutely beautiful I choose to wear shorts, I love that kind of day. First time I wore shorts (in California, Hawaii didn't count) this year was this past week. And it made me smile. Like a big, genuine smile. Not like my fake smile that's been on my face lately. Sorry about that, sometimes you just have got to suck it up. But a beautiful day is the best excuse to go outside and let your worries slide off your back for a little while. This is why my favorite season of the year is summer. Where have you been old friend? I'm glad your back.

Only 33 days until summer vacation begins(=

PS: Thanks Gerald and Omair, ya'll are jerks. That guy scared me!

no worries

As I said yesterday, that conversation was a J-O-K-E. Don't trip. Things haven't really changed since yesterday except for the fact that I'm more confused.

Thank goodness tomorrow's Friday. Three day weekend, yippee! Only 28 more school days until summer(=

Speaking of it not being summer, it's supposed to rain four out of the next five days. Thanks Global Warming; apparently, you aren't that warm.

tortellini

That's what I had for dinner. It's easy to make and quite delicious.

Anyhow, today wasn't very interesting. STAR testing is over. Boo! It sounds strange, I know, but those tests really don't count for anything and the schedule was pretty chill. So, even with all the complaining I did about it, I'm going to miss the STAR testing; rather, the STAR schedule.

I'm very very very very very very confused. Which isn't that unusual for me, but today I am unusually puzzled. What the flux is going on? I can't read your freaking brain, so could you please just explain!? Or not, since that's obviously how this is going to go down.

Most interesting conversation today ended as such...
1. "So when am I meeting your mom?"
2. "Huh?! Why would you need to meet my mom?"
1. "She'll like me. You know, for dinner."
2. "Yeah, okay."
What is this nonsense?! Again, I'm quite on the confused side. Oh well, it was pretty funny.

PS: Today I was told that I smile too much )=

swine flu

Geeze, how much do we love worrying about stuff like this? People are beginning to go a little crazy. I'm trying to keep my head on straight, not worry about it too much. Hopefully it just dies, this whole virus thing. I hope things are just being blown out of proportion and the swine flu leaves us forever!

Only one more day of STAR testing. This is the day I'm most scared for. Chemistry-dun dun dun dun! Not that I'm bad in Chemistry, it's actually one of the few classes I enjoy; it's just that there are so many concepts and equations to remember, I'm afraid they'll be super hard. Oh well, I can only try my best. Today's test was super easy though. My class (of seven, haha) finished in like thirty or forty minutes. We just hung out in the library and talked to Ms. Harris, or should I say, Mrs. Butcher, about Spring Break and her wedding for a while. Then we went to J17 and talked about leadership stuff. Fun, I wish the rest of the school year was this chill.

We're getting down to the wire. Less than thirty more school days until summer. It's kind of crazy. It doesn't even feel like it should be this close to being over. Shoot, am I going to miss class of 2009 next year. I won't start getting all sad until their graduation comes closer though, don't trip chocolate chip!(=

Sharks lost last night. Season over. Boo. Now I'll be watching the San Francisco Giants. I hope we have some shot at playoffs this year. We've been kind of sucking for a while now.

My blogs are getting long and meaningless. Oh well.

My most interesting conversation of the day ended as such...
G: "What's the difference between chance and risk? ..."
C: "Haha, what?"
G: "Just try it, it works like a charm."
C: "Hahaha! No, thanks."
That's not all of it, I'm missing some bits and pieces but I don't want to get the wording wrong. But I still don't get it...

random thought

Well, maybe it isn't so random, but we'll just say it is. Why do we feel the need to grow up so darn quickly?

Lately I've been blown away by the things going on around me. It's like a freaking teen drama television series. Sex. Drugs. Alcohol. What the flux? I'm proud to say that I have not become a character in this show, I'm still merely a viewer. Thank goodness. I'm pretty confident, too, that I will not become a part of this crazy world of people who think they need to act stupid to be cool. Well, maybe stupid is a little harsh. These people may not be stupid, but their actions are. I don't know if you realized, but we're still in high school people. Let's just take a step back and think. Or has all that alcohol and drugs killed too many brain cells?

I'm only 16, and I'd like to keep my innocence, thank you very much. I have too much self respect to give myself up, drink my sorrows away, or be conned into thinking that drugs are cool. It sucks that we now live in a world where you are thought to be "chicken" if you don't do any of this, but it's our own faults. So many people who are doing these things are the ones complaining; um, hello, do you not realize that by participating in this crap, that you're contributing to the problem?

Okay, so I'm complaining too, and I get that I may sound a little whiny. But again, I'm only SIXTEEN and I'm completely innocent. So I think I have a little bit of a right to be complaining.

Maybe I'm complaining so much because people aren't truthful about all of this. Instead of acting like your so dang innocent, complaining with me, being all "I know, right?" about it all, just tell the truth. You made a mistake and now you have to live with it... happily ever after or not.

I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but the purpose of my blog is to vent and write about what's going on in my life. No one is forcing you to read this, so if you don't like it, don't read it. Simple.

goodbye

Spring Break. It was nice while it lasted.

I loved loved loved Hawaii. There's nothing like it in the world.

less than 24 hours

Right now, I'm like pee-in-your-pants excited. I can't wait. Hawaii! Hawaii! Hawaii! Hawaii! I will no longer be albino white. Just kidding, I'm not albino white. Just really white. When I come back I'll be nice and tan. Or red. But I'm hoping it'll be tan.

Junior Prom was last night. It was, um, interesting. I can't honestly say that I had fun the whole time, or even most of the time. But there were a few moments where I was genuinely enjoying myself-and that's good enough for me. Plus, I wasn't even there to have fun, I was working at coat check. Which was pretty hectic. People kept coming back and forth and getting yelled at for it, even though they were told it was okay. I don't know. Some of the chaperones/administrators didn't know what they were talking about. Whatevs. Everyone looked cute. Minus me(=

Anyhow, when it comes to homework for this week, my teachers were pretty nice, for the most part. Well, not really. I just finished most of my work in class. I just have a Spanish worksheet and History outline and study guide. So I have decided to take no work on my vacation. Yipee! My plane leaves at 9AM out of San Francisco tomorrow morning, and we will land at around 11AM (Hawaii time). Hawaii(: Woooooooooo! I'm going to miss everyone, though. Yang and I will call, text, etc, though. No need to fear! Forreal though, I hope everyone has a good Spring Break.

how is it

that teachers have absolutely no hearts? It's freaking two days before Spring Break and I have so much homework. And tomorrow, for my AP classes, I have tests. Happy spring break... not. Ugh ugh ugh. I haven't even started packing... oh well, I'll still have a great time with my bestfriend/yin. I'm so excited.

Oh, today I caught up with my friend Joann. I miss my Joannin! I'm glad we got to talk, even if just for a little bit. She still thinks I'm mean, but at least I didn't hit her today... that's a first(=

Anyhow, Junior Prom is tomorrow night and my date is everyone's coat. Haha, yes, as I said yesterday, I'm working coat check. Yay me! And if my hair stays like it did yesterday when I was testing it, Bettina's right... my sexy hair will get all those junior boys to wish they had asked me. HAHA! Just kidding. I'm excited to see everyone looking so cute tomorrow. I can't wait.

3 days til Hawaii!

junior prom

I get to work at it. Yay! Haha, and I'm only being half sarcastic. I'm working coat check for a little while but then I get to go have fun, until 11:30. Hey, I'm not complaining. I'm pretty excited. I didn't realize I didn't have to work the whole time, so the dress I'm wearing isn't formal. It's pretty casual actually. Oh well, it's not like they'll tell me to leave, I mean I'm the one putting all the coats in bags. Haha. I'm excited about my hair. I just got done testing it out to see if it'll work. I think it will. I hope it will. I'm actually trying to look good. Which is weird, seeing as how it isn't even my prom. Oh well, dress to impress, right?

Oh yeah, you're a jerk, you know! But, I don't care anymore(=

i don't want to live with you

I told her again today. This time she just walked out of the room. Dang, way to be mature, don't you think? All sparked from yet another fight. Seems to be a daily thing. Now either I stop living with you now, or I stop later. Either way, it's going to happen. We don't like each other... at all. I don't know when that's going to get through your head. Or maybe it has, you just don't want to face it. Or you enjoy fighting. Well, let me tell you something, I don't. I hate fighting with you. I hate fighting period. I don't want to become you, so get someone else to fight with. Because I'm scared I am becoming you. And I hate myself for it. I'm being a b-word to people who definitely don't deserve it. I resent you so much for beginning to turn me into the thing I hate most in life. But I'm stopping it now. No more. I need to get out of this darn house.

Other than that, I'm happy(=
I'm staying positive. At least, I'm trying...

what the flux?

The way things have been going lately, I've just been wanting to give up. Not go shoot myself or anything, but I haven't really been trying too hard lately. My grades are slipping, I'm giving way too much attitude to people who don't deserve it, and the things that I have seemed to care about, really don't need that much caring.

That's all going to change today. Today I had somewhat of an epiphany (big word, I know(= ). Today I found out that I was elected as my class' secretary. I was so freaking joyful, jumping around and what not; but soon after I was asking myself, why the heck do I deserve this? Why did people vote for me? Now, don't get me wrong I definitely wanted and still want to be my class' secretary, and I'll definitely put my all into leading my class, but lately I don't feel that I've shown my class exactly what I can do to help 2011 be the very best class we can be. Cheesy, I know, but it works.

I've cared too much about a few things that shouldn't be worrying me. Biggest issue: boys. I'm only 16, why am I trying to rush things so much. I don't need a boyfriend or any other guy to make me happy. I'm fine alone and with my friends, so I need to just be independent. This guy thinks he has too much of a hold on me, and I let the butthole think it. But again, that's all going to change.

I vow that I will contribute more, speak up more, listen more, do better in my classes, ignore, well maybe not ignore, but not spend so much time worrying about the opposite sex, and be as cheery as possible all the time (with no attitude to people who don't deserve it.) I've been a brat lately, and I'm sorry. Things have been going on at home, but that is absolutely no excuse. I cannot let my family life get the best of me. And I will not let it get to me any longer. I'm strong, and now I'm going to show that I am. My life is becoming more balanced as we speak. This blogging stuff really helps. I think I'm going to return to doing this more often.

The end.

PS: Today someone rapped about me! It was pretty cool, only he didn't finish. Okay, now I'm done.

PPS: Wait, no I'm not. Congratulations to my fellow class of 2011 officers of the 2009-2010 school year. Madame President, Mariel, Madame Vice President, Crisann, and Mr. Treasurer, Kevin, I can't wait to work with you this next year; I know we'll do a great job!

Okay, now I really am done(=

yesterday

was the longest day of my life.

Can't you just agree and be done with it?

Phantasmagoria

was freaking awesome. Really scary, but amazingly well written and thought up. It's just kind of scary to know that someone at my school thought of all of this craziness. Oh well, it makes him sort of brilliant, and twisted. But it's cool-one day I think that play is going to be famous, therefore I'm keeping my ticket and playbill. If you went, you should too. I'm just saying(=

Also Trojan Olympics in exactly 6 days. I'm getting super nervous and excited. I can't figure out which one I am mostly, but both are okay. I can't wait to see everyone dressed up throughout the week; they'll be looking so cute!

Five days until mine and Branden's birthday and it doesn't even feel like it. I don't even feel 15. I don't know, I think I just want to skip my birthday this year. HAHA! It'll make Hawai'i (woo!) come faster(=

By the way, you are the equivalent of my butthole. I hope crap fills you up. Oh wait... it already does. You're full of crap. Now get over yourself you arrogant piece of work.

Goodness!

I've been such a busy bee, it's weird to have some down time to blog and let a few things out.

1. I love you guys and thank you for accepting my pathetic apology for my crazy PMS-like actions during this past month.
2. I know I haven't exactly been there for you like I should be, as your friend, but I am. Even if I don't say it, I'll always be there for you. Through the good times and the bad. You just need to let me know what's going on. I wish I could read your mind, but I just can't. Keep me in the loop, I'll help you get out of this crazy cycle.
3. You are pretty much like a brother to me lately, and I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart. Thanks for telling me the truth, even when I kind of don't want to hear it.
4. You think you can play me like a guitar and everything will just be okay? Let me tell you something, jerkface! I do realize what you're trying to do. And though it may seem like everything's fine and dandy and you can get away with whatever the heck you want, think again. One day you'll lose everything and you'll have nothing and look back and be like "Darn, I really missed out." Yeah, that's right. Be disappointed in yourself, cause I'm over caring. Really. I am. I think.
5. You're a jerk too! You think just cause you signed a paper that says you're my mother, you own me? You need to take a step back and look at yourself. Because people are starting to see right through you. You best check yourself, buttface.
6. I know it seems that I've been neglecting you, but trust me, I'm not. I've been super busy, and because you're only 12, you probably don't fully understand. Just wait for when your in high school, I'll be the one neglected! Haha. But in all seriousness, just know that I love you, sister. You are one of a kind.

CAHSEE tests were definitely an insult. Do you really think I'm so dumb that I don't know how many centimeters equal 5,000,000 milliliters when 1ml=1cm? Thanks. It's nice to know that California really believes in its youth.

Spring officially begins tomorrow! I'm so excited for sandals, tank tops, TANS, and swimming! I absolutely love this time of year.

This next month is going to be wild. I love it(=

3/23: Blue and Gold Spirit day
3/24: Sophomore Decorations
3/24: Decades Spirit day (Sophomores: '70s)
3/24: Final Trojan Olympic Practice
3/25: Music Genre Spirit day (Sophomores: Pop)
3/25: Birthday dinner with family
3/26: Branden's birthday
3/26: I turn sweet sixteen (=
3/26: Super Hero Spirit day (Sophomores: Power Rangers)
3/27: Class Color Spirit day (Sophomores: Purple
3/27: Rally
3/27: Trojan Olympics (7-10PM)
3/28: Kevin M's birthday
3/29: Roxannne's birthday
4/4: Shopping/Sharks game with Meera
4/17: Junior Prom
4/19: Meera and I leave for Hawai'i
4/25: Meera and I return from Hawai'i

Super, super busy. Crap, I have two cuts from 3/17 and 3/18.

should have seen that coming

But I guess I kind of suspected it was going to happen, I just hoped that it wouldn't. Turns out, my instincts were right. "I can't come" my buttocks! I still can't help it. And friends "approving" aren't helping either. Haha, thanks guys.

Anyhow, dance last night=muy divertido! Even though only about 100 people showed up, it was really fun. I think/hope Spring Dance is now revived for good. I was really nervous about it not being a success, but from what I've heard so far, everyone like it(= Oh, and the picture of c/o 2011 officers and advisors is awesome.

Today I'm going to a Camp Everytown picnic. I'm excited. I miss and love those kids so much. They make me laugh... a lot. Last Saturday, at Chili's, I think I almost choked at least 10 times from laughing so hard. And I found out that Francisco is a very, very creepy guy. But he's funny... most of the time. And Evan has some funny pick up lines that are very nasty and porn-star like at the same time. HAHA! And Rio stuffs her lips. Hehe, good times. ILY guys!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

to Kwanzaa Striplin. You're a great lab partner. But you need to hurry up and buy a Trojan Olympics ticket!

Haven't had a birthday post in a while. Well, there's a lot of them in March, so no need to fear(=

Anyway, Spring Dance is tomorrow! I hope you're all going. If you haven't gotten a ticket yet, we've extended sales to tomorrow at lunch. That's right. We really want you to go. We've worked so hard on decorations and to make sure this thing happens. And it definitely is. So GO! GO! GO! No more guest passes, sorry.

Also, if you want a Trojan Olympic ticket, see me please!

Geeze. I'm so nervous. Who plans these things anyways? Oh well, I guess I do. I'm going to over think... again. Sorry in advance. I'm kind of hoping you'll back out. Or that you'll have a cousin's party to go to again. Haha. But I'm kind of excited and hoping you won't. I'm so nervous! Wow. Tomorrow's going to feel like a million years. I think this is the reason these things aren't planned.

i am now a driving woman

Sort of. I got my permit today(=
I was really nervous, but I don't know why. I waited my turn like everyone else at the DMV (which, by the way, has some mean people working there) and then they called my number: G206. I walked up to station 16 and the lady took FOREVER typing my information. After that nonsense, she said "Go take pictaa first. It good luck." No joke. Exactly like that. Anyways, so I go take my picture, sign my name, take my thumb print. The guy then gave me my test and I went to one of those stations with the walls so no one next to you can see your paper. I look at it, and what do you know? I got the same exact test that Joann let me borrow. I still got three wrong though. Oh well, who cares?! I passed. Now I am allowed to drive with my mommy in the car. Haha.

I feel accomplished and can now move on with my life.

By the way: DMV people are mean; kill 'em with kindness people. They won't know what to do(=

National Young Leaders Conference

Today I came home to more mail for me. Something from The University of Tulsa and this beautiful thing:



It looked so official that I didn't want to open it. I'm weird, I know. But I sucked it up and opened the seal. Yes, there was a seal. I told you, very official. Anyway, that picture above is the first thing I see and again, it looks super official, so I'm thinking, "There's got to be some mistake, right?" So I take out all of the forms that were in this little official envelope and it turns out, there is no mistake.

"Dear Courtney,
I am delighted to inform you that because of your outstanding academic achievements, you have been nominated to represent the state of California as a National Scholar at the National Young Leaders Conference (NYLC) to be held in Washngton, D.C. this summer 2009."

No pressure. You were just nominated to represent your state. And that's just the first paragraph. I'm so honored, but I don't really know how to respond to this. I mean, they included stuff about past conferences. People like Al Gore, Colin Powell, and Richard Riley, along with a bunch of other official people have spoken there.

Though it's kind of nerve racking, it's really exciting. I really think I want to go. There's six different sessions that are available, so if I do want to go, and my mom allows it, I think there's a good chance that I'll go. I'm still not one hundred percent sure I want to go, seeing as how money's kind of tight right now, but this is like a once in a lifetime thing and if a college were to see this on your transcript, you know they'd want you. Dang, I really want to go. We'll see. My deadline to sign up is April 17.

What do you think I should do?

week of no sleep

I know this week isn't even over yet, but I feel like I've had a total of 6 hours of sleep all week thus far. I know that's probably an exaggeration, but I feel so dang tired. Oh well, I should get used to it.

Anyhow, the first week back from Camp Everytown is almost over. It's so hard. You go to this camp, create a perfect world where there are no judgments made whatsoever, and then they throw you back into the real world to see you drown. At least that's how it seems. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely loved camp. I would go back in a second, no a millisecond. By the way: if you ever have the opportunity to go, don't pass it up for anything. It's one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had. It may even be the most amazing experience I've ever had. Well, back to what I was saying... I didn't think it would be so hard. I thought people supported you after you went to camp. I thought they would be trying just as hard as you were to not pass judgment, to not be prejudice. I've got to say, I'm surprised; and it isn't a good kind of surprised either. People need to think before they speak. I've always known this, but Camp Everytown brought that thought from the back of my mind to the front. I never really knew just how much people did all this crap: make judgments for no reason, speak just to hurt someone, and stuff like that. I don't know. This just makes me realize how fortunate I am to be able to say that I've had the experience of Camp Everytown and how much so many other people need it. I wish everyone in our entire school could go at some point. I think it would definitely bring about the change we need.

I feel like I've been going, going, going all week, non stop. And it doesn't stop. Tomorrow I've got school and then Meera and I need to be at Cinequest at 5PM for CSF. Saturday morning I have to be at school from 8AM-12PM to tutor Spanish 2 kids who need help. Saturday night at 7PM-ish, I'm going to Chili's to reunite with my fellow Everytowners. Sunday is Mariel's and my Grandpa's birthday and at 3:15PM I have to be at school to set up for the WASC people's reception/tea type thing. I don't know exactly what it is, but whatever. Whoa. I just realized that I'll be at school every day until NEXT Saturday. Sheesh. Maybe I should just live there. Haha, kidding. I like my home... in Milpitas(=

If you haven't bought your dance ticket yet, buy it tomorrow! Pretty please?
Also, if you haven't bought your ticket for Trojan Olympics, let me know! I still have some left.

PS: I'm a bit confused at the moment. A bit confused, a bit hopeful, a bit a lot of things. CRAP. Being a teenager sucks sometimes.

miscommunication

Am I supposed to read into these things or not. And if I'm not, shouldn't you do the same? I'm really trying and I think I'm succeeding... to a point. At some point the texting needs to stop and there needs to be more. Unless there isn't anything more. In which case you just need to tell me straight up. I can handle the truth. And even if I can't, I'll deal with it. I'd rather be told now than later.

Anyhow, first Trojan Olympics practice last night. I think it went well. It seemed shorter than it really was but it was super duper hot in both gyms. My partner makes me sad )= Haha, kidding. He's a funny guy. I'll leave it at that.

I'm super tired. Tomorrow's the first day this week that I don't have anything scheduled to do after school, yet I'll probably end up staying late anyways. Oh, the joys of being dedicated. Nah, it's a good thing.

Sorry my life's so boring! Maybe next time you can be more entertained.

HELLA BOMBY!(= I miss you guys, oh so much.

PS: Happy 17th birthday, Daniel San Jose!

uber bomby!

Uber bommy? I don't know the right way to spell it, but those are the only two words that definitely sum up my Camp Everytown experience. I miss it oh, so much. No lie. I would go back right now if I could. The bonds we all created I think, and hope, will never be broken. We all connected while there and we all still have that connection. It won't ever break. Our circle will stay in tact, and like I said on Friday night, expand to more people throughout our school.

I am ready to see everyone together again. I can't wait until tomorrow morning. See you guys at 7:15 with your Camp t-shirts and Hug Necklaces! I love every single one of you.

CAMP EVERYTOWN

(= I'm leaving tomorrow. It doesn't really feel like I am, but once I physically get on the bus I think it will. If it doesn't feel like I'm leaving then... well, then I must be stupid. Which I am anyways, but that will just confirm it. Haha.

Well, today was very eventful. Kind of. Trojan Olympics drawings were today. I got chosen! I'm really excited. But kind of scared and nervous. Actually really scared and nervous. But a good kind of scared and nervous. I'm a little saddened that people like Vy, Ashley, Caroline, and a bunch of other really spirited people didn't get drawn, but we always need a crazy cheering area! That's where I was last year, and just to warn you: it's uber hot there so drink lots of wataaaaaaaa... Wow. I'm cool.

After school I went to TRMS's girls soccer practice today. Ha, my sister thinks she's so cool. She's not. But Guadalupe thinks that my sister knows more about being cool than I do. "I beg to differ" as she would say. It was good bonding time with Guadalupe and I. LOL! Her and her incorrect grammar. Silly goose!

Shoot. Cellular bill came in today. We have unlimited text messaging, but I had over 2,500 last month... I believe I'm going to be in trouble. Hopefully my report card makes up for it.

Class: Final Exam/Final Grade
Chemistry: C/A-
AP History: C/B
Algebra 2: A/B+
Spanish 2: A-/A
Leadership: A/A
English: B-/B+

Geeze, 2,500. Must be some kind of record. Definitely is for me... Shoot. I'm dead.

"stare & think about you"

Ha, that's a funny joke! Nice try, buddy.

Anyhow, camp everytown in two days. I'm stoked(=

More mail for me today; this time from New York University and University of Miami. Same thing as all the others. Website, username, password, get free stuff. Haha, bribes.

Done with my homework by 9:00PM for once. It's pretty cool. I should do this more often. I even studied for my tests tomorrow! Now i'm off to finish up packing for camp. Maybe I'll even curl my hair. Hey, why not. I have the time...

Oh yeah! Trojan Olympic drawings tomorrow. I'm kind of nervous. I don't know why, it's not like I'm doing anything. Locations have changed from the announcements this morning. Now it's like this-
Freshman: Theater
Sophomores: Theater
Juniors: Small Gym
Seniors: J17
They are all still at lunch though. See all you Sophomores at the theater! Goodnight!

i realize

that I have already blogged today, but this is something truly blog-worthy(=



So, I return to my beloved Milpitas, and when I enter my room I find a stack of mail addressed to me. I never ever get mail, so I'm thinking, what is this nonsense!? I read the envelopes and I realize... colleges! This is super exciting and equally scary. Colleges? Sending me mail? This means that I'm growing up and getting ready to leave. I don't want to. But I must admit, this gave me an adrenaline rush. Haha. Anyhow, most of them are kind of eh... but the college that has been my dream since I was 7 sent me something. When I saw the Santa Clara University envelope addressed to me... I literally started jumping up and down. I haven't really been thinking about SCU to go to college. It's super expensive and pretty impractical, what with the economy and the fact that my family's pretty tight on money nowadays, so SCU hasn't really been my number one college for some time now. I mean, it will always be my dream school, but I'm trying to be realistic here. This letter, though, it gave me hope.

I know that I'm definitely not the only high school student to receive the same exact letter, only with their own name on it, but it's renewed my dream. A letter to me from the Dean of Undergraduate Admission saying that I'm a talented high school student and that she wants me to find out what part I like about SCU the best really impacted me more than I thought it would. I've already gone online and entered in my user name and password and whatnot. I'm excited, if you can't already tell.

Aside from Santa Clara University, I received letters from Mills College, Montana State University, University of the Pacific, University of Puget Sound, and the National Student Leadership Conference.

But more on that tomorrow. I've been so distracted by this that I haven't been studying. In order for me to get into any college, I need good grades. Bye!

PS: I'm taking my driver's permit test on March 10 at 3:00PM(=

school tomorrow

I want today to last forever. Well, it can start lasting forever after four o'clock.
I come home to my loving Milpitas at that time(=

I'm excited. I miss stinky ol' M-town. Ha, but really. I can't stand San Jose. I don't know anyone over here and I feel like an old fart not going out and doing anything.

CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN! CAMP EVERYTOWN!

If you can't already tell, I am a bit excited about Camp Everytown coming up on Wednesday. It doesn't feel like I'm leaving this week. It feels like I just got the paperwork on it a month ago. Anyways, thanks to anyone who bought See's Candy from me. Because of you I didn't have to pay a dime to go. It'll be like an extended sleepover with my best friend, two girls I miss dearly, and some new people. I cannot wait. So maybe today shouldn't last forever. But I'd like to skip tomorrow and Tuesday, please? Ha, yeah right.

You know, my mom won't let me miss school for anything unless I'm like on my death bed. I haven't missed a day of school since seventh grade I think. I really want to just play hookie for a day, but I know that's bad, so I won't. Even if I said that I would, I'd probably be too chicken to follow through with it.

Anyhow, back to the dreariness of homework. I'm almost done. I just need to study for Chapters 25 and 26 for AP History, finish my worksheet and study Chapter 7 for Algebra 2, study Chapter 5, Grammar 1 for Spanish 2, start my mini quote explications for Chapters 1-5 of AQWF, and if I have time, start my Stoichiometry cheat sheet for Chemistry. Mostly studying. Why didn't we just have all of these tests before break so we didn't have to worry all week? Gosh, sometimes I think teachers need to think a little more.

break's over

i want more time off. i just got used to waking up late and not having to actually do anything. ugh. and i need more time to study. i have a feeling i'm not going to do well on my tests this week.

camp everytown starting after school on wednesday! i'm so excited. i know people call it camp-cry-a-lot or whatever, but i'm glad i get to experience it. i have a feeling i'm going to create some strong bonds there. i still need to pack though.

i have a feeling the rain is coming back. in san jose it's really gloomy right now. and the wind is picking up. and my puppy's going crazy so i'm going to go take him for a walk before the rain starts.

hope your weekend is going wonderfully(=


EDIT: the rain is now pouring. and the wind is freaking me out. my window won't stop shaking )=

hot and cold

is what you are. boy, oh boy, am i confused. don't talk to me for what? a week, a week and a half? and then BAM! you speak and let me know that you like me again? what is this? if it's just a quick thing because no one else is into you at the moment, screw it. i'm not going to be your back up. i deserve more than that, so get yourself together and then let me know what you're thinking or feeling or not thinking or feeling. i really don't care what it is that you're going to tell me, as long as it's the truth. because i really can't take being so confused anymore. if you just need a friend, then i'll be that. if you need more, we can talk about that. i just need to know what you really want/need. i need you to tell me, not text me. i need you to call me or talk to me in person about it. but, i'm not going to just keep texting. i know we talk in person, but not about all of this. i don't even know if what your saying is you saying it. i hope it is, because i'm a naive idiot if not. but i'd rather know now than later down the line when i really fall for you. because i can feel that fall coming. and it's already making me feel like a bunch of crap.

i'm imperfect. i over think everything, i'm too trusting, i talk too much, i am scared to death of you, i can't stand this thing we're doing-whatever it is.
i don't know what you would see in me. maybe you are just screwing with my head. wouldn't be the first time, would it...



PS: sorry about this seemingly emo post. don't worry, i'm not. i'm just confused as heck!

i feel like

food. i'm quite hungry at the moment.

but i also feel like i've done absolutely nothing productive over break. it's over halfway through and i feel like i've been doing homework forever, yet i've finished nothing. i still have an AP history chapter outline, two AP history chapter study guides; algebra 2 chapter 7 study guide; read chapters 1-5 of All Quiet on the Western Front, do mini-quote explications for each chapter of AQOTWF, find and define vocabulary words in AQOTWF, do AQOTWF scavenger hunt; study spanish 2 chapter 5-gramatica 2.

but yesterday i started and finished two books. yes i'm a nerd, sue me. but i haven't read anything other than school-required books in a long time. i forgot how much i missed it. i really do love to read. it takes you out of your own life and into someone else's. sometimes you need that. i bought four books at barnes and noble, which i apologize for, because i really love borders at mccarthy ranch. but i had two gift cards to B&N and i thought that i should use them. but, i probably should have just read these books in the store seeing as how now i have two books that costed a total of $13.98 and i just needed them for one day. anyways, it was worth it; they were great. i recommend that you read them.
Can't Get There From Here by Todd Strasser
This one's kind of dreary, but the ending's somewhat happy. It gives you a look into the lives of some homeless kids, essentially. The trials and tribulations they go through, their day-to-day life. It almost seems as if the author had been in that position. At parts it's really gut wrenching, so if you really don't want to be sad, don't read it. I like this author. Even though it's the first book that I've read of his, a couple other titles of books that he's written are Give a Boy a Gun and How I Changed My Life.
Sweethearts by Sara Zarr
This is the best book I've read in a long time. It's about a girl, Jennifer, and her best and only friend, Cameron. They go through a traumatic situation together in elementary school and soon after, Cameron disappears. After eight years, he is back in Jennifer's life. This brings memories, good and bad, flooding back into Jennifer's mind. She's changed since Cameron left; she's popular, not fat anymore, and even has a boyfriend. Will she change back to the old Jennifer? You should read it to find out(=
i have two more books that i bought, but i promise not to read them until my homework is finished.

last night i went to Oakridge with my sister. i bought a cute little dress, necklace, and bag for me and i bought my sister a pair of jeans and a bag. oh and some cookies. ha, well, now i'm pretty much broke which sucks. but that's okay because now i have no excuse not to do my homework. except reading, which i promise i won't do until i'm done.

off to get some breakfast; it's the most important meal of the day you know...

february break

begins tomorrow. i have no plans except to do my homework. my homework of which i have too much. ugh, what's the point of a break from school if you are burdened with two tons of homework to do? i'd almost rather stay in school all week. almost, being the key word.
i have two AP history chapter outlines, two AP history chapter study guides; algebra 2 chapter 7 study guide; read chapters 1-5 of All Quiet on the Western Front, do mini-quote explications for each chapter of AQOTWF, find and define vocabulary words in AQOTWF, do AQOTWF scavenger hunt; spanish 2 workbook page 54, study spanish 2 chapter 5-gramatica 2.
again, i ask: what is the point of a break from school if it isn't truly a break from school?


EDIT: look what i found! hahaha. brian catches some funny faces. this was from the cultural heritage assembly on friday. gabe bondoc is a truly amazing singer. it's one thing to watch him sing on youtube, but live he's even better. (even if i was behind the speaker staring at his back, LOL!) i hope he releases an album soon.

valentines day

or as it is named for me, singles awareness day. naw, just kidding. i heard someone say that yesterday and i thought it was quite hilarious. anyhow, i'm sick, my throat hurts, and i now know that i may be the least interesting person ever. exciting stuff, huh? (=

i'm sleepy. goodnight!
and happy valentines/singles awareness day!

four tests

tomorrow. i'm already sick of studying.

at least tomorrow's friday(:

soccer game tomorrow? check.
visit ms. doherty because it's her birthday and my sister made the team? check.
basketball quad game tomorrow? check.
talent show tomorrow? check.

well, it's going to be quite a busy day. and if anyone hasn't picked up their sadies pictures yet, please do tomorrow. i'm getting tired of missing my lunches. thanks!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Almost...

to two friends who have been there with me since almost the beginning.

Chris and Trevor Dimich:

Happy (early) 16th Birthday! Well, I probably should say birthdays, but whatever; you know what I mean. Anyways, I know over the past few years we haven't talked or hung out as much as people who have known each other since diapers should, but I just want to let you know that I love you guys. You mean so much to me, whether I show it or not. You don't know how proud and grateful I am to have you two in my life. (Or how happy I am that I share my whiteness in a school full of unwhiteness with you guys, haha.) I will always be right here for you two. We've been together starting with crazy days in preschool, to dinners at Casa Azteca, Outback, and Chilis, and now to birthday number sixteen, and for as many more birthdays as there are in store for us, I'll always be here for you boys. I LOVE YOU! Happy (almost) 16th Birthday! Birthdays, whatever(:

-Courtney

PS: We've got to go to dinner soon! Strangely, I miss almost squirting some gross thing out of my nose from laughing at you two crazies(:

semester 1 grades

mine are crappy. or, as my mom says: "they're so bad you aren't going to get into a good college. you'll be stuck at De Anza or West Valley." ugh! i just wish i could prove her wrong. i wish i was able to say "no, i'm getting into my dream college and it'll be easy. because i work hard and i give school my all because i know what it means. i know it's my future, and that's why i care." too bad i can't. i did work hard, but i could've worked harder and be able to argue with her about this. but i can't. now i'm second guessing myself, afraid that i'm not going to make it to college. shoot, with these grades and California's budget cuts, i probably won't be able to.

chemistry: B+
AP history: B+
algebra 2: B
spanish 2: A
leadership: A+
english 2A: B+

and my chemistry and english B+'s were 89.somethings. if i had just tried THAT much harder i wouldn't have to be worrying so much. this sucks. i need to freaking stop messing around and get focused. dangit i wish i could go back to middle school days. i hate how fast life is going by. i hate worrying about the future. i just wish i could stay in the present forever.

i get the message

and now i'll be stopping. or trying to, anyways.

but maybe, hopefully, i'm just reading into things to much again. gosh, i'm hopeless!

it's the little things in life

that make us the absolute happiest.

the things like smiles, little waves, a nice "hello", and questions that seem like nothing, but really change just about everything.

i like those(:

GAME ON.

three day weekend

mine has been taken over by school. finals are this week and i'm going crazy. i need someone to just shake me and tell me to calm the freak down. i'm really scared i'm going to kill my grades. i'm not prepared for any of my finals, except for leadership where we aren't doing anything but preparing for sadies. speaking of which, i'm going without a date, so stop asking. hopefully it will be better than homecoming, where i felt completely out of place.

on the brighter side, this next weekend all i'm doing is studying for my permit test which i think i'm taking the first or second week of february. i'm pretty excited. i'm ready to drive, i think. but i'm really scared and nervous. my mom says that's a good thing, she says it means i'll be more alert. but i'm afraid that it'll make me more jumpy and therefore a bad driver. but i don't know, only time will tell. if anyone wants to help me study, give me a ring-a-ding-ding(:

whoa, i'm confused.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

to my best friend, Meera Narayanan. Today, at 7:51PM she turned 15. Yes, she's a youngin(: So, Meera, happy birthday! I love you!

Anyhow, I just finished watching the Sharks game. We won 6-5. Some people may think hockey is a hillbilly sport, but whatevs to that! It was quite the exciting game, there. They came out like BANG! Especially #29, Ryan Clowe, he was like a bull hitting that one guy on the Red Wings. And then when they were talking to Devin Setoguchi, "We can't let this team, the best team in the NHL, the momentum they need" and then Joe Thorton turns and says "We are the best team in the league." He shoulda been paying attention to the game, but it was funny, so i forgive him! Well, this is quite the boring blog here.

Finals next week. Woo. (that was a little bit of sarcasm for those of you who didn't catch that.) Good luck!

bleh

this week kind of sucks. for many reasons. but only one thing keeps coming to my mind, and i don't like it. i knew this was going to happen! i even said it was. but no, i was blinded by idk what it is; but i was blinded by you, your seemingly kind words, only to find out the real reason you talk to me. well, i'm still not sure, but i have a hunch. or maybe we just talked to much at the start, and now we've run out of things to say. if that's the case, i wish i hadn't talked so much. i wish we still talk like we did. eh, wtheck am i saying, i don't even know it was you saying all of that! we don't even actually TALK that much. eh, boys are dumb. but we already knew that(:

sucker for smiles

that phrase right there is one way to describe me. dangit! i can't get that dang smile out of my head. i think i'm mad and then i think of that stupid thing and i can't be mad. what the freak? i think there's something wrong with me. ha, just kidding. sorta.

oh speaking of sucker for smiles, check out Jennifer Chung's music on youtube or myspace. i was just looking around youtube and i found one of her songs and i can't stop listening! she's awesome.

have a great weekend!(:

the perfect boy

well i've been thinking. and i've been thinking hard. and i've finally got it. now trust me, i'm not trying to make anyone feel bad because this is not what they are or this isn't what they have. if that's the case, sorry. this is my dream guy. the ultimate. which, i know, chances are slim of me even meeting this boy. but that's why i call it a dream guy, the perfect boy; i don't even know if he exists.

make him tall, dark, handsome. he's himself around me and doesn't feel embarrassed about it. he gets me to come out of my shell and talk to him. actually TALK. and it's not like he forces me to, he just gets me to want to. he isn't the kind of guy that keeps something from me. if he really knows me, and he's my dream guy, he'll know that he can tell me anything and we'll work it out together. he's got a brain and he isn't afraid to show it. he doesn't try to pressure me into anything i don't want to do. he isn't cheesy all the time, but occasionally he does something uber cheesy, like in the movies, that is completely adorable. he understands me and likes to let me know.

eh, who am i kidding, a perfect boy doesn't exist. and that's okay. i'll meet a guy one day with many of these things, and more characteristics that i love about him. i'll meet him and i'll be happy. and that's all that matters.

the end.

by the way: who's going to sadies? i have to go for leadership, speaking of... buy your ticket tomorrow! with ASB it's $5, without it's $8. it's a one day blow out sale, next week it goes up! if your interested, we're selling after school tomorrow at the satellite kitchen near the E building. see you there!

happy new year!

late new year, anyway. i really had to sit down and think about my resolution. because this time, i want to keep it. and i want it to mean something. so therefore, i'm not going to tell anyone, at least not anytime soon. we'll see. and even though i don't like my resolution all that much, i am really going to try and keep it; if not for me, for my family. it's important.